Only In Dreams

I wish I knew why some dreams that I have are so much more vivid than other ones. Is it something I eat? Is it because I'm more tired than usual? Maybe it has something to do with the position I'm sleeping in, who knows? What I do know is that there are mornings that I wake up and recollect a dream as if it actually happened because it's so colorful and detailed in my mind.
This morning was one of those times and I will share with you the transpiration of this dream.

Let me start off by saying that this was a dream that included several stages of my life on one, microcosmic setting. I like it when that happens because to me, this kind of dream is supposed to mean something. Anyway, the dream started at the home of my closest friends, Nate and Josh, who are brothers. Only, it wasn't their childhood house. It was in Beverly, which is where I grew up, but it wasn't the same house. I have no idea what house it was and I don't think it's a house I've ever been in. But it was their house. There was a party there and pretty much my entire group of friends from high school was in attendance. I do not remember any presence of alcohol, however. I guess it wasn't an integral part of the dream.

The next part of the dream involved one of Maggie's (Nate and Josh's little sister) friends trying to hit one me. Here's where the whole 'several stages of my life' part comes into place. La wasn't with me at the party. but I actually said to this other girl in the dream, "I have a girlfriend, leave me alone." I ever remember feeling as though I wasn't sure where La was and trying to call her. Weird. Also weird is that this other girl was actually Vicky Vallaincourt from the movie 'The Waterboy'. And she was the same character as well; I think she told me "you ain't man enough fo' me, anyway" once she realized I wasn't interested.

Then comes the weirdest part of the dream. I was in the kitchen of this house long after people had left, and I was slicing up a whole pig in the proper cuts that one might get from his or her local butcher. I remember that I had planned on putting all of this stuff in the freezer for Nate's mom, sort of as a thank you for letting us have a party at their house. I also remember feeling extremely guilty as I was doing this, because of the whole meat issue that I'm currently dealing with.

I stopped before finishing the job of cutting the pig (which was dead when I started) because I just couldn't do it. It was pretty gross. But then I was left with this carcass and all this cut up pork, so I had to get rid of it. I put all of it in a plastic trash bag and started to walk it out of the house, but I ran in to Josh on my way out. He was coming home from driving some people home and he chatted with me for a few minutes. I wouldn't tell him what was in the bag. Then I left to walk up the street to dispose of the bag.

I walked as far as I had to in order to find a dumpster that I could inconspicuously ditch the bag in. I didn't want to leave the bag in Nate's garbage; no idea why that was. So I drop the bag and start to walk back to the house, but at this point, I have absolutely no idea where I am. Next thing I know, a live pig runs up behind me with a tennis ball in his mouth and nudges my leg. He then drops the ball at my feet and grunts while looking up at me. So I threw the ball down the street. The pig stayed with me for a while, playing fetch and just kind of following me on my walk to find Nate's house again. Then at one point, he saw a mother and her baby walking into their house, so he ran after them. I never saw him again.

After walking for what seemed like hours, I give in to calling Nate and asking him where I am. Again, this is supposed to Beverly. There isn't a part of this city that I don't know. But I tell him I'm on 'Union St.', and he says that I'm downtown. He lived nowhere close to downtown when we were kids. I asked him to come and get me, and he said "give me five or 45 minutes". After walking further into town, I realize that I'm in the Downtown Crossing section of Boston and it's now morning. People are everywhere, and I run into another old friend, the Alison. She was smoking a brown cigarette and we walked to meet Nate. That was it. I woke up at this point.

My analysis of this dream will show that it highlights current issues in my life and actual situations. It is a reflection of many things that are happening to me right now.

1. The Vicky Vallaincourt thing.

Last night was one of the rare nights that La and I were sleeping apart, so that might account for the fact that she wasn't present in the dream. She obviously existed to me because I remember thinking about her during the dream and trying to call her, wondering where she was. This makes sense because we spend 95% of our time together.

2. The pig incident.

As I've mentioned in a previous blog, I am having issues with meat as of late. Red meat has become a rarity in my eating life and I can't remember the last time I ate a pork product. Cutting up the pig left me feeling very guilty, and I also remember thinking in the dream that La would be disgusted if she knew I was slicing up a pig for food consumption. This is why I stopped doing it. I felt bad, guilty and displeased with myself for this.

3. The trash fiasco.

La and I go up to New Hampshire pretty often on weekends. We generate a decent amount of trash while we're there and we have to take it with us when we leave because there's no trash pick up there. Lately, we've been stopping at this restaurant up there to dispose of our garbage in their dumpster. I always feel a little bad about this and kind of look around before I toss the bag. Oh, the name of this restaurant is the Yankee Smokehouse and their logo happens to be...you guessed it, a pig. Hence, I was disposing a dead pig in someone else's trash and feeling weird about it.

4. The pig pal.

See #2, #3. Maybe this pig was trying to tell me that I should feel really guilty for slicing up his friend, but the fact that he was playing fetch was certainly an effort to depict a pig as a pet; I'd never kill something that I'd keep as a pet.

5. Union St. & Alison

I can't really go into detail about this one, but a close friend of mine will know why this is pertinent information when he reads it. It has nothing to do with me directly as Alison is a name in his past. And it's got nothing to do with him cheating or anything like that...whatever, it makes sense to me that it was a part of the dream. If you really want to know, email me.

6. Downtown

One of my current goals in to get back to working downtown in Boston. In my dream, I'm lost and can't find my way. When I finally find myself in familiar territory, it's in downtown Boston and I know exactly how to get home. Maybe I'm closer than I think to landing back in the city.

It's kind of fun to pick apart dreams and try to make sense of the individual events within them. Of course, it's a rarity for me when I remember such specific details of a dream, but maybe there are reasons why this one was so vivid. They say that the average dream lasts no longer than 20-30 seconds. If this is true, that dream may have been the most efficient dream in the history of dreams.

Weekend Notes

-Got a wicked bad sunburn New Hampshire. Also, I realized that the rotation of music on WCYY in Portland must include Greenday's Working Class Hero as well as the new White Stripes tune. This rotation happens about every 90 minutes.

-The Sox completed an offensively deficient road trip at 3-4, their lead in the AL East diminished to a mere 9.5 games over the streaking Yankees. If any of you listen to or watch Mike and Mike in the Morning on ESPN2, you can hear Dick Vitale every Monday morning. Today, he warned all Sox fans that the Yankees are coming back and the Sox need to start looking in their rear view mirror. Hey Dick, here's a news flash for you. You just beat up on the Pirates and the White Sox. Clemens wasn't exactly on point in his first start, either. Let's talk after the next two series with Arizona and the Mets.