Climate Control

I wonder how many times over the course of the year that I'm consciously aware of how long it's been since I've seen the sun. Sure, I saw it briefly this weekend up in NH but it was a fluke because it wouldn't have happened had my urge to urinate not woken me up at 6:15 am. So as I look outside over my left shoulder, as I look at the gray, lifeless/leafless, tree-lined parking lot outside, I again wonder when we're going to have a nice, warm, sunny day here in friendly NewEngland...where the weather has a penchant for bending its residents over and continually porking them until mercy is merely an afterthought.

I had a look at historical weather patterns for April and May this morning and I came to a horrific realization: April, on the average, has more clear days than May in the city of Boston. Now, I've lived here my whole life and I guess I should know by now that May isn't all flowers blooming and picnics in the park. The average temperature in the month of May is just over 58°, which doesn't exactly make me want to celebrate the fact that we're more than halfway done with April. But this happens every year with me...somehow, May is the finish line for the long winter's race that I, as a New Englander, limp through consistently from year to year. Yet, May still sucks. Maybe it's not the frosty, ball-shrinking chill of winter but it might as well be. What's with this raw, dreary, depressing shit? As the rhyme goes, it's April showers that bring May flowers, so I'm always expecting a rainy month this time of year. But May sees only 6 clear days as compared to 7 in April. Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't photosynthesis need SUNLIGHT?? I hate that stupid rhyme, but maybe the May flowers/Mayflower joke is one of great wisdom and tomfoolery. There's no flowers in May, folks. There's rain, wind who knows...if we're really, really lucky this year, maybe even a little snow. Just awesome.

I love hearing New Englanders champion the whole four-season-a-year angle when they talk about loving it here. Yeah, me too man. There's truly nothing like being cold 8 months out of the year and then anticipating the cold during the remaining four. It's true, though. For most of the summer, I spend my time thinking about every day passed is another day closer to the chill of Fall/Winter. It's fucked up. Another aspect of New England that claims to have such a hold on its residents is the fabled Fall foliage. I say 'fabled' because really, does the event of the leaves turning color towards their eventual death warrant its own name? I've always been intrigued by those who take specific trips north to 'take in the foliage'. I'm wondering, at what point in a person's life does taking in the foliage begin to create excitement? If I had to venture a guess, it's probably around the same time that sex becomes nothing more than something that happens on your birthday, holiday gifts have dwindled to socks and underwear and the only thing in your life that offers any break from your grudgingly mundane existence is a trip to the can following a long and arduous bout with constipation.

I know you're probably thinking that I must have hit some brutal traffic this morning, or perhaps I didn't sleep a wink last night and I'm overly irritable. Neither of those are true. I'm good today...perhaps even great. I just happen to be reaching my annual breaking point with the climate of our metamorphic region. Onto brighter things...

Is Josh Beckett really a new pitcher this year? Is he vastly different than he was last season, when he sat pretty at 3-0 in the second starter's slot? Yes, he is. Correction, he has been so far. I've been hearing both sides of the coin in this debate since his last start, but his stuff is better this season. When you compare his starts to last season, he just has much greater command of his pitches than he did last season. Sure, he's yet to face that vaunted Yankee lineup, or Toronto's loaded deck and yes, we'll see what he does on Saturday afternoon against those very Yankees...to me, he looks more confident and more comfortable out there than he did all of last season. I can appreciate the comfort that goes along with pitching with a 5, 6 or 7-run lead, but he's been throwing like it's a 1-run game. Beckett gets in trouble when he relies on his fastball to get him by. With command of his curve and his sinker there's no need fall back on his four-seamer like he did all of last year. Still, I don't think he's going to win the Cy Young and he'll probably end up with less than 20 wins and an ERA around 3.7 or so. But he's a better pitcher this year and than he was last year.

The other Sox issue that's been hot lately is Coco's struggles at the plate/pretty much everywhere else. We've been hearing that he offers nothing valuable to this team and the only asset he really has at all is his speed. I don't disagree, and I don't think his leash should be any longer than another week or so. Everyone remembers how well Wily Mo did in his 40-or-so starts last season. He also played a flawless center field and he's got a very good arm...something we haven't enjoyed in a center fielder since the Gold Dust Twins era. So what if Coco just mails it in after he gets benched. His signing is already a black mark on the record of Sox brass as it stands now, regardless of his injury. For the amount of effort it took to get him here, there should be question about who our center fielder should be. Other than the fact that we have Wily Mo waiting in the wings, there's also the emergence of Jacoby Ellsbury that seems to be laying out the not-so-distant future of that position.